Saturday, June 30, 2007

Got a guy arrested tonight.

So going back to work after dinner break and right by my house this guy has his package just wipped right out!!!

Just so happens firemen are returning to station right next to me down the block. I flag them down and tell them the situation. Turns out he makes a vulgar display when he walks past them.

a 911 call later and a trip back home to the fiance to give her the heads up, I stop by the fire station to thank them when the guys returned from going after him!

They gave the cops his location and 20 min later they call me to sign papers for a report.

what a wierd night, to end a hectic week!!

p.s. they had multiple reports of this guy doing that sort of thing in the area before, good to finally get him.

Wednesday, June 27, 2007

I have 2 lunch buddies... but one is leaving in August.

She looked very nice and wore high heels. It is tough to turn down a hot chick.
Because otherwise you would be eating lunch by yourself on the river and posting a recap with pictures of birds.

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Thanks, but I don't need a hug

I just need people to get the hell off their superiority pedestal and look down on all of us who like things they find lame and stupid.

But of course, what do I know...I'm just some redneck rasslin fan who has no teef and lives in a trailer park and beats my ol lady. That's what you think, isn't it? That's all us fans are to you, isn't it? Because, my god, you are so freaking special and superior to all us low lives.

A tribute....

Eventhough it looks gruesome. I am chosing to remember him as the guy who left everything in the ring and got standing ovations even when he lost. He is in my all-time top 5 favorite perfomers.

That being aid, I hope we learn all the details of what happened because I would hate to have his legacy tarnished by assuming he just snapped and killed his wife and son. I am not condoning killing someone, but I would like to know why.

Chris and Woman, taken to soon
They were such great rasslers
And now we'll never know what they could have done
One thing we do know, with the WWE they would have won.

Wrestling forever, sleeper holds in the sky
I just hope the Wrestling fans fans remember to try
Cherish every moment, because one day you'll die

There's obviously substantial overlap between

Cardinal fans, wrestling fans, and NASCAR fans.

It's called a trailer park.

Monday, June 25, 2007

With boobs like that....

...I'm okay with the height. She's supposedly 5' 11"

24, busty, blonde hair, blue eyes...
...and she emailed me out of the blue?
...there HAS to be something horribly wrong! This is TOO perfect.

almost got arrested at court house..

appearantly, you can't bring a cell phone into the building.. AT ALL.. WTF!?!??! so the guard told me, trying be all tough.. and I SIGHEDDDD...

thats IT!!

"sir, we don't need the attitude"

"um... i'm just upset"

"don't argue with me"

"what?"

"sir, i'm going to have to ask you to leave"

"WHAT?!?!!"

"thats it, you're done" (gets on radio)

"what the eff ever [throw hands in air and leave]... I'm GONE.. PEACE!!!"


Dude was seriously overweight.. and I was about to ask him to run after me. I've met many good cops, but I can't stand the mofos who think they are secret service....

no wonder people hate cops.

Friday, June 22, 2007

I'm gonna try something

if I post my resume here, could people alert me of what I would be qualified for? Since I am looking outside of my immediate area...that way I can send something that I know I have a legit shot at outside of the Central Illinois area instead of just wasting my time?

Thanks.

TINA PO Box 126 Small Town, IL 62666 ▪ (217) 671-xxxx ▪ TINA5879@???.com

OBJECTIVE
Looking for a career position to futher build upon my abilities I have gathered from my education and work experience.

EDUCATION
Robert Morris College Springfield, IL
Bachelor of Business Administration Degree April 2000
Associate in Applied Science Degree -Computer Networking December 1998

COMPUTER SKILLS
Platforms: Windows 95/98/XP
Applications: MS Word, MS Excel, MS PowerPoint, MS Outlook
Web Authoring Tool: HTML, MS FrontPage

WORK EXPERIENCE
Self-Employed Middletown, IL
(June 2006-Present)
Worked on several Information Technology Projects for Local Companies related to Database Management Part Time transportation and house sitting duties for residents of Middletown

ASHLEY FURNITURE Springfield, IL
Customer Service Rep (March 2007-June 2007)
Answered phone calls and forwarded to proper personnel. Took phone orders. Filed sales in proper locations. Printed orders and forwarded to manager. Took payment. Answered questions from customers. Processed financing applications and forwarded to proper locations for approval or denial.

STATE FARM INSURANCE Bloomington, IL
Consultant, Spherion Personnel Team - IT Maintenance (Nov 2004-May 2006)
Maintenance, Storage and Operation of Database Files used by Disaster Recovery Team Created and Published Reports based on Usage of the Database Files by the Disaster Recovery Team Reported to proper personnel when problems arose in the Maintenance of the Database Files machines or servers.

Self-Employed Middletown, IL
(June 2002-November 2004)
Worked on several Information Technology Projects for Local Companies related to Database Management Part Time transportation and house sitting duties for residents of Middletown

Robert Morris College Springfield, IL
Computer Assistant (January 1999-April 2000)
Created databases for supplies, license plates, and all items in storage.
Maintained departmental records and information on computer system.
Wrote memos to members of the faculty and staff.
Library Assistant (September 1997-December 1998 )
Assisted the faculty and students with library resources.
Checked out materials for students, faculty, and staff via network database. S
orted and coded incoming materials accordingly.
Opened and closed library as requested.
Issued student identification cards to new students.

i'm glad we've got some supplies. we're in the same boat

mainly.

i hate the pull out method, but that's been our fallback. the pill is out, the doc won't even hear of it (that's ok iwth me).

condoms stink. we use them sometimes, but only the lambskin ones (latex makes both of use sore and itchy). those things aren't cheap, ($7.00 for 3 of them!) and they are still a condom.

so we start au naturel, and 90% of the time i just wait until after she goes, then we have to stop while i put one of those on. not that exciting.

rhythm works ok, but...

Going to do the Secret Shopper thing

decided that since I have some money ($1300) in my bank account...I can afford to go ahead and give this a shot while I look for work (and still be able to do it when I do work as supplimental income)

Anyone ever done this before and give me some good advice?

mini-pck does a little public service:

Authorities thought that mini-pck's exceptional referee skills could be used to moderate a domestic violence situation.


Things turned ugly and mini-pck had to take the guy down.


Then, sadly, mini-pck had to take the couple's baby into protective custody. It was obviously a squalor situation. Sad night.

Dude kissed my wife then wouldn't shake my hand.

I am at a bar association meeting in Lake Geneva Wis. This big shot fat guy lawyer kisses my wife on the cheek and ignores me. I know the guy, but he doesn't acknowledge me. I am an attorney just like him. I'm not a ISBA big shot like my wife or him but I could care less. I hate those parties.

I think it goes back to the day when I saw him at the strip joint. When he saw me, he ran out of there like he was too important and his repuatation mattered too much to be seen. He saw me in the front row, but he thinks he got his fat ass out of there before I saw him. Jokes on him. Sort of.

Now my wife's at the fancy party and I'm about to take the kids out for ice cream. I won't be responding to any comments. Time to go to the beach. I think I got the better end of the deal. Better to hang out with your kids than 100 self-important lawyers.

Thursday, June 21, 2007

do you have anything better to do with your time?

why do you insist on letting this conversation go on? i am so bored of it that i really dont care anymore. do people actually have jobs? way too much time on their hands because want to argue and argue forever. I am trying end this thing, but people have way too much time on their hands. I am not going to argue fro hours because i dont have the time to do it. i think it could be a bad trade in the future and noone is going to convince me otherwise right now. Really people, find something better to do than argue on the internet. i am trying to end this in a nice and easy way, but people are like rabid dogs that wont let go. MOVE ON ALREADY!

find a hobby.

There have been 5 different knockings on our front door

in the past half hour. I didn't answer the first four (I think I heard people shuffling around) and the people that came over on the fifth were here for about 2 minutes before leaving. No clue if they were the same two that have been back and forth of if there have been different people.

If this keeps up as I'm going to sleep, I'm not going to be happy.

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

so i head for my surprise trip over memorial day weekend

a cruise to the bahamas!

we arrive EARLY like 1pm for a 5pm docking and hit the top deck off of the bat, doube grey gooses and so forth

well half of my party passes out at 11pm leaving me unattended and not very interested in the comedian so i wander to the piano bar red hot and tipsy, i start doin jager bombs with a guy named chico and requesting off the wall shit from the piano guy which he wont play

so i meander off to the casino and start droppin nickels on the chicago faves, 23, 34, 17, 8....i hit twice and start throwin 5 dolla chips at everyone in the casino....at this point it gets hazy....i toss out roughly 500 bucks by my calculations and reports from my new buddy chico, he got a bill for his babysitting troubles

at this point he takes off and what happens next can only be remembered from the next morning and my pictures

i wake up in the morning surrounded by a few hundred bucks and hear.....do you know what happened last night?

i say.....um.....i gambled

apparently i was escorted/carried back to my room and thrown on the bed with my seapass cause i went up to the top deck and was screaming at the rain under hard wind conditions...i overstepped the baricades....when approached by cruise staff i told them its ok im the captain!! and they can go away

when they grab me i said FINE and went and laid down on one of the flat chair and tell them ill sleep here till the bar opens

WOW

so i figured that was it till we get ready to take our voyage off of the boat the next day

they scan m seapass and all the monitors go red and they said i have a "message"

i tell them its OK...ill get it when i get back

no....i must go talk to the captain

APPARENTLY....i wandered into the bowels of the ship somehow and got into some control rooms and got to the captains wheel

when they discovered it i bolted and headed to the top deck to get away from them

he started with......"youre not in trouble but......

they almost cut me off for the rest of the cruise

i ended up having to only get like 1 out of every 10 rounds from there on out cause everytime they scanned me, they were checking on my intake

that was night 1

My entire body hurts today.

Kung Fu was pretty rough last night.

We took the mats out and practiced falling again.

An evil black belt named Victor showed up and taught us a bunch of dirty tricks to pull out when we are in street fights.

Tuesday, June 19, 2007

One time a homeless person asked me for money so they could buy lunch.

I went into a taco bell and ordered 2 soft tacos. They gave me taco supremes with sour cream. I showed them the mistake and they made me new ones but did not collect the sour creamy ones.

I then tried to give the sour creamy tacos to the homeless person outside. She refused to take them. I gave her an evil look and said, "You just asked me for something to eat and now you are turning it down. You are crazy."

She then took the sour creamy tacos and thanked me.

I hope she got sick!

Monday, June 18, 2007

Just negotiated a discount on bull semen

Bought a large quantity
The supply reserves were getting low.

Sometimes things happen to me that let me know how it feels to be pck

I went to check into my hotel last week and the girl working the counter said that there was no reservation under my name. I told her that my office took care of it, so maybe she should check under the company name. She still couldn't find it so she asked if I had a confirmation number.

Luckily, I had printed out my email confirmation so I dug it out of my luggage and handed it to her all disgusted-like. She looked at it and said "This reservation is for the Hampton Inn down the street. This is the Ramada Inn."

I said "Have a nice night" and slinked away into the darkness.

My MIL got me a card with a pic of a mountain and then filled

the entire inside with a story about how she once saw this mountain and what a great time she had. WTF??? Put a check in a card and be done with it Bonnie!

man, i think i took my formerly iron constitution for granted.

i have been messed up since saturday night.

can't sleep, can't seem to have complete bowel movement, i feel all bloated-y, have indigestion like pain...

this is not good.

i forgot to mention i hurt my ribs again. daggone kids are getting too big to wrestle in the pool at the same time. (and i'm not getting any younger).

*updates Facebook status*

words of wisdom: No matter how harmless you think it might be..

...never, EVER under any circumstances take an ex-gf to a mutual friends wedding.

Total and complete wohstihs.

Did a kegstand on Saturday night

Yeah, it was at the party with all the talent. I lasted the second longest upside down. I am proud to say that your kegstand champeen is none other than Mrs.

Sunday, June 17, 2007

*pours one out for my childhood cat*

Whitesox the one-eyed cat was killed by an overprotective mom deer in northern Wisconsin today, after 18 years of being awesome.

Thursday, June 14, 2007

So how do you know if you're on a date, or just hanging out?

Also, there will be no update tomorrow, as I have no time.

mini-pck looking for a little fun:





i just don't see the disadvantages to charging a fee to drive in downtown Chicago

obviously there have to be some, but of course the press i have seen on this issue is one-sided.

i am all for trying to make us a society less dependent upon oil. i have heard about city planning in england and elsewhere where they just aren't putting in roads that you can drive on (only walkways). now this tax, a way to try and force people to drive less. i am all for it.

first off, i never drive downtown. i always use public transportation (even though it is time consuming and such for those of us who live outside of the general areas around the el's). it is just less stressful and cheaper to buy a $5 day pass then to find public parking for $15-30. and you know what? the el's are generally empty out in the far reaches of the city and the burbs. almost no one makes the same choice as me and i understand that to some extent (cta does usually double my travel time and sometimes increases walking distance). but to some extent, it blows my mind that people don't take advantage of public transportation more, especially with skyrocketing gas prices.

let me add this for all the selohssa who want to jump down my throat about my above statement:

my statement was meant as an invitation to tell me the other side (that is why i put that first sentence in there, admitting that i had only heard one side of the argument)

of course, people here just want to put me down just because of the username instead of having a legitamite conversation about it.

i am going to work. have a good morning all

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

For the next 30 days, I will be making myself do daily blog entries.

Shut up, I will too!

Now taking suggestions for writing material, TIA

I just found a giant piece of sea weed in my crack.

Comment by the crazy co-worker this AM...

"I shot a squirrel this morning."

She bought a pellet gun to shoot the squirrels that come up on her porch. Evidently she brought it into work Monday after she bought it over lunch.

She's also wearing bowling shoes and Pete Maravich floppy socks with clamdigger pants.

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

i know nothing about computers...

but i will let you know there are plenty of decent, basic laptops under 1k these days. i will leave which ones are good up to the experts.

How long has Tina had fake posts?

*Phil Leotardo*Either this thing means something, or it doesn't.

What Would you like to see?

OK, since I am planning (the key word here is planning, because I don't know what my nights will look like in the coming months, but they have been real work related since April) to do a complete redesign.

I have a few ideas of things that I think will work out well, but I would like to get some input, too.

On the plans now are a complete renovation of the Daily News Links, because that code has been sitting there for the last 6 years now, and never updated since it was first written. It works, but there are some things that can be done to make it even better now.

Other than that, I don't know what else people would like to see. I have guesses, and I think my guesses are pretty good when it comes to stuff like this, but I will see.

So, now is your chance, what do you want to see? If you could change something, what would you change?

Any answer is valid, though some may be less valid than others.

For those that needed closure on my roommate.

They had dinner plans for tomorrow night, she invited her friend to come along. He now has the message.

Monday, June 11, 2007

KUNG FU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I was embarrassed to go on Thursday because my uniform was too stinky. It has been washed and is ready for kicking some ass.

classmates' ears are safe. They know how to protect their ears. We spend a lot of time learning how to block.

Sleepless in Seattle comment

Why wouldn't Tom Hanks just call ahead to the airport and have them hold the boy until he got there? he was quite the backpack toting rapscallion, what a scamp!

it was towards you and all the instagaters here.

this thread was about Ankiel, but you guys are like a pack rats wanted to go down this rentaria road again. you just cant leave things alone. alot of spineless twits on this board insist on starting trouble with me. This is what you do. you can't stand alone against a cardinal fan, so you guys ban together and try to attack others because that is the only way you can do things. you kept pushing and pushing and i was trying to ignore it. you can't handle opposing opinions on here and it's obvious. you want the mean and vicious Darrin back towards the Cub fans,you got it. you else noone else to blame but yourself. The Cub fanbase is so arrogant and pompus and they think they know everything. they could learn a lesson from a real fanbase like the cardinals. when things dont their way, they throw things on the field. wow, that something to be proud of. the fanbase is much like the team, a bunch of losers that will never win. oh, when exactly is the last time you a won world series again? the better question is how many more decades will it be before you win it again. LOSERS,the cubs and the fans are LOSERS. BTW, when did the cardinals win the world series again? oh yeah, last year.

most of you will be dead and buried when you guys finally win won.

you want war, you got it Beotches! sorry, but those gutless mother effers did it.

those sorry sack of sh*ts wont hear the end of it now. the thing is, i can be 10X more vicious than i have been in the past. the shackles are off and i am free.

i hope i am creeping you out. you have so many internet socalled tough guys that wants to talk trash. step out in the real world and say something like. you would have a foot so far up your a$$ that you can taste it.

Hmmm, does this chick want me?

Group ex instructor at our gym, and worker at the other north side location.

"So you're going to have to show me around the Southport area because I just moved over this way like 3 weeks ago and since all my friends are gay they will only go out on Halsted Street. It sucks because if I ever want to do anything I have to go out over there. Lately I have just been being a loser and stayin in by myself because I'm sick of the boystown scene. Not to mention that I would hate for you to miss me too much since my time at *gym name* will be limited these next couples weeks "

I'm too broke to buy toilet paper

so I just went and stole some from our public restroom.
Now I won't have to use paper towels in the morning.

Saturday, June 9, 2007

Well...the inevitable happened

I got my 2 weeks notice today. Last night I was told that they were cutting back and that this was my notice. That's all I know. That's all i was told.

but this did happen to me before when I worked for the state. They alerted us that the contract was running out in 2 weeks and they didn't think they would be able to keep it.

Claim of slow work period. Cutting back. Going with 3 CSR's in alternating shifts.

Was told if by August or September if I am still looking, to put in an application again.

Roommate update.

He just returned home, angry as all hell. The girl not only brought along her friend, but she also brought her uncle...they had a picnic.

Friday, June 8, 2007

My poor roommate.

All day's he's going on and on about how hot and cool this girl is and how much he's looking forward to their date tonight. When he called to make plans, she said that she'll be bringing along her roommate....she non-dated him.

My poor roommate.

All day's he's going on and on about how hot and cool this girl is and how much he's looking forward to their date tonight. When he called to make plans, she said that she'll be bringing along her roommate....she non-dated him.

so i'm thinking after the gf leaves for china...

i'm shaving my head

its hawt out. yeah and who cares i'm not trying to holler at anyone

I decided against taking drugs last night.

And I've been pacing the hallways in pain for the last hour.

Thursday, June 7, 2007

Why does Champaign Police call us for donations?!?

We don't even live in Champaign.

Yeah, when I told them I don't live in the city of Champaign... They said "But you have a Champaign mailing address and don't you shop within Champaign?"

I went ahead with a skirt

But it's short and not flow-y, so hopefully there won't be any problems.
No, really, it's not the kind of skirt that blows in the wind. Even 50-mph wind.
No, it's short, but not billow-y. It ain't goin' nowheres.
Seriously, I'm not that old and I don't have bad legs.

is this your first time on the deuce?

a lot of people, VIV in particular, like to talk in circles, inside jokes, and ultimately avoid responding in any meaningful way

Wednesday, June 6, 2007

Favorite TINA category

I'm gonna go with...

This Is How I Feel. Deal With It.

I just cropdusted a couple women in the Best Buy parking lot.

They were downwind and I didn't know they were there when I let one rip.

I knew it was pretty nasty right away, and 5 or 10 seconds later they were both choking...

When I was a kid, I had a pet mouse

In fact, between my sister and brothers and I, we literally had hundreds of mice. Instead of a cages, we used old bookshelves with wire mesh across the front, and holes drilled in the shelves with ladders so that the mice could move from shelf to shelf. If was almost like a mouse village, with certain groups of mice ruling certain shelves. It looke kind of like this:

Because there were so many mice, they didn't all get a ton of attention, and, for that reason, some of them were really mean. Mean to us, and really mean to each other. I did have one favorite one though that was a mix of black and white. He was easy to pick out so I played with him a lot and he got to be very tame. I even taught him how to walk a tightrope. Kind of like this guy:

Sometimes when people would visit us, mom would say "get your mouse and show how he can walk the tightrope." Needless to say, I was very proud. One day, we were out practicing in the yard, and my mouse was taking a break walking around in the grass. I didn't keep an eye on him, and when I turned to look for him, I knelt right on top of him. When I picked him up, he was convulsing. And he actually died right in my hand.

I was so sad, but my sister and brothers thought it was funny. I hated them for weeks after that. To this day, they still tease me about killing my tightrope-walking mouse.

Tuesday, June 5, 2007

Kung-Fu recap

I lost my fight to Terry. He is a 40 year old air traffic controller. I was rusty.

Monday, June 4, 2007

so i was involved in an altercation outside of..

Guidos on Sat night. Stopped at the stop light. Drunk guys hits me while I'm at dead stop. He and his friend get out and tell me its ok. Cops came.. they took off driving.

Thing is.. people say both work at Guidos. Still pondering my move. Should I be a jerk? No outside damage was done to Jeep. They hit the spare tire in back. I can make some moves.. just not sure.

Thoughts?

i'm thinking about talking to the manager/owner. lawyer buddy said I should sue them and the guy. i'm thinking... geeeeesh.. i'm just going to drop it

Kung Fu starts back up tonight!!!!!!!!!!

52 hours in London...

arrived at 12:30 pm thursday, left at 4:45 Saturday.

In that time I ate 3 meals, had at least 50 drinks and fell in love with an Aussie stripper.

And of course I was out here last night until midnight drinking whiskey.

I'm completely f*cked.

ahhhhhhh Drea...

I was done with getting dances and ready to go I thought. She was dancing on the stage right in front of our table and must have seen me watching her, because she came right off the stage and sat on my lap...

I've never seen a smaller waist on a person...

I think she ultimately coaxed about 200 quid out of my wallet...

She said if I paid her 300 pounds for an hour she would buy my drinks and that she would drink me under the table... looking back I wish I had taken her up on it.

Sunday, June 3, 2007

Effin' A! Seller has had my offer for 36 hours

and hasn't accepted it yet.

Dude... i have some wiggle room... if it is such a hard decision then counter it... but do it quickly.

Current offer is 94% of listing... with 2% back to cover closing costs. I think that is pretty fair... do ya think I went too low?

Friday, June 1, 2007

Putting in an offer on a house tomorrow

Please send me some good karma.

Email I just sent from work to my personal email account

Subject: Rent
Date: 6/1/2007 11:06:22 AM

Pay the rent, motherf***a

Sincerely

_____

you know what....

I'm getting OLDER... and I love it. I love being proud to love 80's music. "We built this city" just came on my streaming music.... and I remember dancing and air drumming to this song in my pjs

i think my generation was one of the last ... its ok to be happy gens...

and i'm proud of it.

born in the 70's, grew up in the 80's-90's.. kickin arse in 00's!

*gorilla air guitars*

drama unfolding with one of my workers...

Had an employee of mine practically come on to me tonight...

Not sure what to do here. If I did anything with her and someone found out, I'd be gone in a heartbeat. Plus she's been with her current boyfriend for like 3 years.

But good lord, is she hot.

the official "you people were right" thread...

i couldnt stay away.

oh well.

i will be peeking in every once in awhile.