Interesting conversation while doing the urinals in BWs

Stepped in front of a guy accidently, while in the bathroom at BWs. He said go ahead when he saw my chief t-shirt. Noticed he had an Illini hat on. He said his brother played OL for the illini and a lot of the players liked Zook. Asked him about the Beckman hire. Said a lot of the players are confused about the situation. Apologized about stepping in front of him. Nice kid.

vast majority of time, i'm glad i'm a man. but the whole "feeling" that women have after

an O leaves me a little envious.

thoughts?

thank you Orange roughy....

You just totally embarrassed me on another board, but thats ok. I guess if that makes you feel any better then sobeit. if you thought i did the same thing, then i guess you got me back. Now, you have made it impossible for myself to have any credibility, but thats ok because it makes you feel better. Why dont you go ahead and embarrass me on the scout board while you are at it? Might as well try to destroy me in every way possible. You win because you have the power of your own blog. I guess some people have to read it and listen.

you dont want to know what "being owned" is trust me you better make that last word you ever say to me you got me???

Him saying that i was "being owned" was the wrong thing to say to me right now. It's one thing to say i got you back for what you said, but to take it a step forward and saying you are "owning" me, thats throwing the first punch and all you did is piss me off even more.

How the eff is Ambien even legal?

Took some to sleep last night, and apparently scared the crap out of the wife. Called her down to the basement to tell her that the light was crawling the walls and I was scared because I didnt know if it was going to take me to sleep or to hell. Then, I proceeded to [front] grope her while staring at the DVR light. How is a drug that does that approved by the FDA?

FYI: Dear Mr. Internet is Serious Business...

Thanks for meching me and emailing my potential boss. Thanks a bunch.

P.S. Go #### yourself with ####ing aids infected dick.

P.P.S.: I hope you die in a tirefire.

First, let me say I'm an animal lover.

I'm not big on pets -- not from an animal rights perspective -- because they are smelly, dirty and they eff up their things. And I'm done for cleaning up other people's poo (with one exception, which hopefully won't be an issue soon).

So when I go to the zoo (pre-kids), the discussion always was on a 1-10 scale, the likelihood of killing an animal with a baseball bat. you are wearing jeans and a long-sleeve T-shirt. It sparks good discussion. I think a leopard clocks in around where your high school batting average was + .1, multiplied by 10.

Man I must've been still mostly asleep when dressin this morning.

I can't believe I put boxers on and then jeans. I almost always go commando in jeans anymore...it feels awfully cramped.
FREEDOM!!!!!!!

My junk shows and the friction of jeans on cock can cause a party in my pants...until it hurts.

i slept in the guest room for a handful of nights last week

little Al's ears were bothering her, wanted to be near mom, so i retreated to basement guest room.

took morning whizz at 6a and upon entering the room to re-rack, was greeted with a cloud of code brown smell. "holy hell , what did I eat? must have been fartin' up a storm in here. nasssty. " cracked a window, re-racked.

kids come down at 7 to say goodbye and both give me the stink-eye: " Daaadddd" " I know, girls. your dad is a powerful man. remember that. " Quick hug, off to school.

I go to bed the next night late. Though not nearly as much, it STILL stinks in the room. Now the only minor phobia i have ( stinking ) kicks in. I start thinking that it's part of age and i ooze some funky old man juice and i've got to go to Sears in the morning and Weatherbeat myself.

i start to wonder if i will ever sleep in the same room with my wife. I sleep downstairs again the next few nights, window cracked a fist's worth.

mrs. comes down one day to my office and passes the bedroom door. "why's the door closed?"

" You know my phobia about stinking, right?"

"yeah, it's not a phobia, you're just a little sensitive about it."

"well, the room rekes like a korean elevator. i can't figure it out. it just stinks and i think it's in the sheets now. my god, it's like that henry james novel, beast in the jungle. what i've obsessed over has come back to haunt me."

mrs. walks in the room, lobs the gratuitous "smells like an old person in here" and notices a dog shit on the comforter.

"there's your beast in the jungle, henry."

Adfession: I mostly don't understand fears

and tend to think that most of them are irrational, and hence am a little insensitive to people who are afraid of a lot of things. I just think they can be overcome. Mrs. mother is afraid of everything, including dogs, heights, can't swim, etc. It just gets a little ridiculous after a while. Mrs. has claustrophobia, which is the one I most don't understand. I fully admit to being prick-ish about this subject

hoardering is my worst fear in life, those shows about hoarding absolutely terrify me. The sort of fear that I am referring to is the type that affects your life and your ability to live it, such as, I can never go on a boat because I can swim and afraid to go in the water.

Do you have meat grinder and sausage stuffer attachments for your KitchenAid?

i have five fresh trout fillets to cook tonight
suck-ass rules:
1. can't cook inside on pan ( mrs nixed that idea).
2. gotta cook outside on gas grill.

I'd whip up a batch of Trout Dogs. nothing says summer like troutwurst

so, i hung out with two prostitutes tonight

went out with a girl i met at a club last weekend... and things took a pretty wild turn. i had no experience with that lifestyle, so it was kind of crazy seeing how they operate. it was really fun though... definitely a unique night. she was a hooker. the other girl works for her now. her friend was working i drove her a guys house and me and my girl waited outside while she did her thing.

they weren't like stunning... but they were both very close but i have a little bit lower standards than most here probably. i had my camera with me but never quite got the occassion to pull it out. mostly though it was just real cool getting to know them and seeing the way they went about things... i learned so much about that lifestyle just through observing

so i don't share *too* many kid stories but this one got me all cracked up

9yr old: when we were at camp, one of the days we got to choose which station we were at. And I chose the spa station. and I was the only boy there.

me (somewhat concerned): well what did you do at the spa station?

9yr old: got to hang out with the girls at the beach!

me: *high five*

9 yr old: oh, and we put oatmeal and honey on our faces and it made our skin smooth

me: oh.

You were right......

I was wrong

There us no way anybof you are as drunk as I am.

South beach WTF.

And what have I missed the pasnt few days? Folly a. Lot. Evraska WTF

I have nonifea WTF I wasaskiv here.

you have done zero lined, so WTF

i heard rex reed pan shutter island on local radio last night

he was on with another old fag. they were terrific. i stayed in the car, mesmerized.

"where are the stars these days? WHERE ARE YOU, BARBARA STANWYCK?"

The man is the leader of the household

If a woman wants to have a huge career, don't have kids and leave the husband home.

My cat just got his salad tossed by one of his cat friends.

Weird. Didn't really put up a fight either. Blech. Fortunately, they are not blood-related.

I'm pretty drunk and I'm eating toast with honey.

I kind of gave up on it. I've got honey in my chest hair, on my hands, my keyboard. #### it.

Oh, and I'm nekkid. *3fg*

If there was someone I hated, truly hated and wanted them dead, I would kill them.

As long as it was a well thought out plan, the odds of me getting away with it are pretty decent. The only consequence is jail, nothing in the afterlife. So if I'm confident enough that I can get away with murder, I would do it. I wouldn't do it, if I knew that as soon as I died I was going to be judged for it.

There are more people that think this way, than you think.

Most murders aren't well thought out, and there are some murders that are unsolved. If I were to plan out a murder, making sure to leave no DNA, witnesses, evidence, it makes proving a murder very difficult. I'm not saying I would get away with it, but there is a good enough chance to risk it if you hate a person enough and won't be judged after death.

Case of beer, maybe.

Bunch of shots. 8 ball of blow. 3.5 pounds of pulled pork. 6 ears of corn, 6 racks of baby back ribs, 2 racks of St. Louis style ribs, 2 platters of fries, 4 bags of donuts. Probably a 1/4 oz. of weed. 27 jr bacon cheeseburgers. Some speeders. Bunch of whippets. 50 wings in 45 minutes. This was around 5 p.m. 'til about 1 a.m. Then I took some ecstasy and drank some shots of Hot Damn. I don't know what all else I did. There are parts that are fuzzy. I was told I had sex. True story.