Hi! I decided I no longer want anyone to use my real name here

do it and you will get banned. (this is no alterego. you all know who i am)

TIA

see, this is such a nazi board....

everyone falls in line with hating me. everyone on here is so far up each others ass it's not funny. Thank got we have some actual illini board that has common sense. BTW, i'm not the only one that thinks this board sucks. You should hear some of the thoughts of other people. Some people dont even recongnize this place as a real board because everyone has to be some renegade on here. it's like a country club with losers. A bunch of uptight snobs that doesn't even know what reality is. They wouldn't know even if it bit them on the ass. A bunch of no class jackasses on here that uses 5th grade terms to communicate.

you know what #### it...

you and that ####ing taint nugget of a human can have this place.

ban me and the IP please.

really to all the single people out there...

i just want to stress that you have to be careful. its so easy to lose sight of the consequences, but a one night encounter just cost me hundreds of dollars, hours of my life taking 4 tests at 3 facilities... and multiple life times worth of stress... and im very fortunate that everything was negative.

i think it was nookie who had a thread a few weeks back about 'is it worth it'... i didnt want to post on it at the time because my situation was still undetermined, but the answer is absolutely not. honestly, i feel like i crawled out my own grave today.... im leaving it alone for a longgg time.

in this situation... she kinda took it there before i had a chance. i mean, im not saying she raped me, but it wasnt really consensual.

it was like this: we met at a party... a week or two later she calls or texts me... wanting to get dinner real quick. i was cool with that.

now, this paints me in a bad light, but im going to tell it because someone out there might be in a similar situation one day and benefit from my advice. so we were at her place hanging out after. she was on the bed watching some tv show. i was like, thinking out loud and said if im going to be in the bed id be more comfortable taking my jeans off. cause i really just dont feel good having clothes on in bed. i meant that in sincerity, not game. now, she is like, actually, id prefer you naked. now, i was fine with that, but i really wasnt expecting it to go further... i wasnt going to make a move. she was touching me and stuff while watching the show, which was fine... but then she got up, and i thought she was getting off the bed, but she got on top.

and really, there was probably a second or two second window where i could have acted... but at the time i was afraid to hurt her feelings by suggesting she wasnt clean.

I've had 41+ first humps.

I'd assume there was kissing involved during most of those.

FYI

I just had me some birfday xes.

Boo to the Yah.

Teh bonerz are in full effect since I got off the crazy meds. I think I may have gained an inch.
(EDIT: BTW, I got an awesome Illini mug for my birfday. It's prolly the coolest Illini mug ever made.)

So, a really bright guy who claims to be an Illuminati...

is trying to recruit me. He's talking about metaphysics and other such things. He's a guy I met through an online game on the PS3. Super nice guy. But now I am thinking it's best to avoid this dude. Illuminati? GTFO.

my greatest Olympic moment

was at the red rock bar in slc 2002 when I stopped all action and had the 1980 hockey team chanting USA! USA! while I drank 5 pints in a waterfall

eruzione held the anchor glass

barely spilled a drop signed jackets with a sharpie the rest of the evening

lam

Real men don't wear pink unis

They looked like a bunch of ####ing pussies out there. The fact that others may agree or disagree is irrelevant to me, but that's cool if you like pussy looking uniforms. Ever stop to think why no men's teams wear pink? I don't care how many times they wore them, it was disgusting and I'm embarrassed for them. I wouldn't wear a pink uniform and i think less of any man that would. I think it's an abomination.

Wear a dress to work on Monday, then we'll talk.

so there are these two attractive girls who work here

yesterday, they were at lunch together in a fairly large atrium in our building and they both waved me over from afar (i should say, i know them). i chatted with them a bit and went about my business. i noticed a number of galoots oafing about, clearly envious of my situation.

there was a time. there was a time when that kind of status would've thrilled me. i don't think that's unusual (and the great maha kali knows, i rarely did anything other than squander such opportunties) and, even if it is, such an encounter would make my day. not just the attention from the ladies but a perception that i had elevated myself in the pecking order of man cubs.

anyway the point here is that i got none of that now. no charge whatsoever. mostly annoyed by the small talk (and their obviously transparent motive for telling me how good looking i am). didn't care that other dudes were giving me silent props or that i may have converted some skeptics.

i just want to get out there. i don't care anymore. i don't even care that in my post-coital moments, i feel more like a teddy bear in my wife's arms than vince vaughn's bear-who-eats-the-rabbit. it's pretty much over me.

If an ugmo hits on you, are you flattered or insulted?

Or both? Or something else? I don't really mean ugly, just someone less attractive than you. I mean, enough of an attractiveness differential that you kinda wonder, "Really? You thought this might work out?" About 90% of the dudes taking aim at me, I'm thinking, "You really think you might see me naked?" How is it a compliment if some ugmo thinks I'm in his league?

I'm a blonde with enormous cans who dresses kinda trashy--I look easy.

I just hate pompus jack asses that own over rated rip off restaurants

In February (and I wasn't paying thank god) I went with 3 other people to Nobu at the Shore Club on South Beach.

We had to sit *ON* the dance floor, so we couldn't even talk to each other without shouting.

The bill before tip was something like $1,200.

We made the cab go through a burger king drive through on the way back to our hotel just a couple hours later.

I have no use for places like that. I could give a flying #### what my foor looks like. I'm here to eat.

Have you ever saved anyone's life?

Pushed a guy out of the way of a moving car and then proceeded to get hit by said car.

I did the Heimlich maneuver on my mother-in-law....on Mother's Day, no less.

I pulled up to a stoplight and a drunk was passed out with his car rolling towards the intersection
I hopped out and put the car in park and woke him up, then drove his car over to the side of the road and told him to call someone.

I refrained from a killing an old cubicle mate who ate too loud.

I pulled a garage open to someone who trying to kill themselves through carbon monoxide.

other facts that may or may not be known

once locked myself in a locker thanks to you cant do that on television...blamed a bully out of embarassment...still feel bad about it
i have been arrested 4 times
i went through a stripper phase in dating
i posed nude for money in college
i have experience with trained falcons
i bought condoms to a family reunion and used them
i have been hit by a car in garcias parking lot
i tore my acl/mcl/miniscus in a drunke trampoline accident and still partied till dawn on easter sunday
i once ate 4 monster burgers in one evening and spilled my extra large beverage in the hardees lobby 5 times...each time asking for a free refill...then work up on the toilet with explosive bowels
i shaved my basektball number in my head in 8th grade
i have totalled 4 cars
i almost died twice in mexico...once with "jay-z" in a pot deal gone bad and then losing 30 lbs in 3 days due to some unknown stomach issue...i dropped into random non english speaking clinics to shots of demerol to keep my party goin

So last Friday some dude I passed on the sidewalk randomly stopped me

and asked if I wanted to have coffee or lunch sometime. Yeah, yeah, I'm just *that* compelling.
But no, seriously, people do this?! Dudes, have you ever done this to a broad? Chicks, has a dude ever done this to you, and how did you respond?
I had a friendly conversation with this dude but said there was no way I was giving a stranger my contact information.

This prolly isn't an avenue that you, of all people, should pursue.

But given the fact that she's a damn good-lookin' atty that's been married to me for 7 years now (and with me for 10), I'd say I must be doing something right.

I just met Tony Dungy

He is signing his new children's book here in Tampa. He saw my Illini shirt and asked if I'm from there and I said 'yes'. I lied to Tony Dungy!!!! Anyways, I also said that I'm a Bears fan and that if we had to lose to anyone, I'd prefer his Colts. No lie there. Nice guy. Soft spoken / demeanor. This is my greatest brush with fame, ever

July 10, 2007

Happy Chastiversary to me!!!!!

What, it's possible I'll do it again someday.

When I was in first grade,

I was the only kid who didn't get a handwriting award cause I was late on my fine motor skill development. It made me work harder on my handwriting. I turned out ok.

When I was little, this is what our swimming pool looked like:

It was just an old horse tank that my dad picked up somewhere. It was nasty and had a bunch of welds on it where dad had patched rusty holes. It would get filled up once a year and we were stuck with the same nasty water, unless there was a reunion or something, and then mom would change it. She did, though, add about a gallon of Clorox once a week. Everytime I swam, my knees and feet would get all scraped up from rubbing on the bottom.





Our pool toys consisted of an old innertube



quarters, and empty bottles of dishwashing soap that we used as squirt guns.